I’ve been eyeing off a pair of classic Melissa’s for a while now. I love the tactility of the PVC and the way you can look like a lady and a whore at the same time. I’ve been so close to buying a pair for months now and I honestly don’t know what it was that made me hesitate. I now know it was my incredible karma gland that stopped me because in just a few short months Melissa shoes will be releasing their Vivienne Westwood collection. Here is the red shoe that they are using to pimp the collection…
I want them. I want them in black and I will wear them with fishnet stockings and red lipstick. I will wear them with ankle socks and a pinafore. I will wear them with harem pants and a Bonds singlet. I will wear them naked because the indescribable beauty of these shoes will distract the police from my indecent exposure. I’m currently sweet talking all the Melissa stockists in town so I can get my hands on them the second they arrive in my fair city. I’ve never felt this way about a shoe before. I’m sure it’s a mix of the ladylike court-shoe shape and the slutty rubber. I’m such a complex character and ownership of these shoes will surely serve as an introduction for strangers. “Hi…” The shoes will say. “This is Lady Smaggle.” Pause. “She likes to bake cookies and rob banks.”
Love Lady Smaggle
xxx
9 Comments
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Ivy – I completely agree that these shoes would look hot on me. I have no idea I have managed to laid without them for so many years.
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LOL, ahhh another funny post. You really reviewed these shoes to a tee! I love t-bars. They’d look really hot on you, actually. I hope you get them!!
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I too must have these. In red and black. Shoe-gasmic.
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OMG i love those shoes… especially the t-bars 🙂
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I want to be friends with the red pumps.
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I love Melissa shoes, but these red numbers take the cake. I may be hot on your heel trying to track down a pair too. (pun intended) 🙂
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Emma – I’m seriously considering getting both myself. They are just made for Smaggle!
Cupcake – I know! I LOVE t-bar shoes.
Natasha – They haven’t released the full range yet so maybe there will more colours than black and red?
Super Kawaii Mama – You shouldn’t have any trouble finding them in Melbourne. They also sell them online!
Pingbacks
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[…] These are the shoes. Disappointed? Yeah so was I. I LOATHE spending money on shoes that I can’t dance in. They don’t even sparkle. If I’m spending above $30 (yes, I am actually that tight) I want the most specatular shoes on the planet – gorgeous, comfortable, makes me drop a dress size in seconds and they should come with a free overseas holiday and a packet of Jelly Tots. As you can see I’m having difficulty coming to terms with the fact that I just spent about years worth of thrifting money on ugly shoes. Ugly shoes that GAVE ME BLISTERS!!! Blisters in my rolling high arches. I have HIGH ARCHES that ROLL. Does that sound like a contradiction to anyone else? In case you haven’t caught on to my bitter tone I started my fitness course this morning. My trainer is a sadistic prick. I can’t remember exactly what it was that we had to do in the obstacle course (my brain tends to block out pain) but it went something like this – Run a kilometre, stab yourself in the thighs with a fork, run a kilometre, get your legs run over with a lawnmower, run a kilometre, break some bricks with your butt cheeks, run kilometre, have a whole football team stamp on your arms, run a kilometre and then finish it all with a lovely session of being punched in the guts. I had to run through this obstacle course 10 times in one hour with no breaks wearing the Fugly Blister-baker shoes and the jerky trainer refused to administer morphine for my pain. I have a plan though. If I manage to make it though my Monday, Wednesday and Friday session every week for the full 6 week period I will allow myself to buy the beautiful shoes… […]
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[…] for Melissa mary-janes. They were released in Australia about two weeks ago and despite giving some serious loving to my local Melissa stockists none of them managed to secure the line at their store so I was reduced to emailing the manager of […]
[…] These are the shoes. Disappointed? Yeah so was I. I LOATHE spending money on shoes that I can’t dance in. They don’t even sparkle. If I’m spending above $30 (yes, I am actually that tight) I want the most specatular shoes on the planet – gorgeous, comfortable, makes me drop a dress size in seconds and they should come with a free overseas holiday and a packet of Jelly Tots. As you can see I’m having difficulty coming to terms with the fact that I just spent about years worth of thrifting money on ugly shoes. Ugly shoes that GAVE ME BLISTERS!!! Blisters in my rolling high arches. I have HIGH ARCHES that ROLL. Does that sound like a contradiction to anyone else? In case you haven’t caught on to my bitter tone I started my fitness course this morning. My trainer is a sadistic prick. I can’t remember exactly what it was that we had to do in the obstacle course (my brain tends to block out pain) but it went something like this – Run a kilometre, stab yourself in the thighs with a fork, run a kilometre, get your legs run over with a lawnmower, run a kilometre, break some bricks with your butt cheeks, run kilometre, have a whole football team stamp on your arms, run a kilometre and then finish it all with a lovely session of being punched in the guts. I had to run through this obstacle course 10 times in one hour with no breaks wearing the Fugly Blister-baker shoes and the jerky trainer refused to administer morphine for my pain. I have a plan though. If I manage to make it though my Monday, Wednesday and Friday session every week for the full 6 week period I will allow myself to buy the beautiful shoes… […]
[…] for Melissa mary-janes. They were released in Australia about two weeks ago and despite giving some serious loving to my local Melissa stockists none of them managed to secure the line at their store so I was reduced to emailing the manager of […]