Have you ever seen the movie Scarface? Yeah… neither have I. On Saturday night Mr Smaggle and I wandered aimlessly around Blockbuster trying to find a DVD and we stumbled upon Scarface which is one of those films that if you admit that you have never watched it in front of certain people, they will act as if you just punched a child. Not that we punch children but the shock value is obviously the same. So to avoid such situations in the future we decided to just bite the bullet and watch it.

After around half an hour I fell asleep on Mr Smaggle’s lap and stayed there for the full three hour duration of the film. Hence why I still haven’t seen Scarface. I did woozily raise my head on occasion and gasp at the epitome of style that is Elvira. From what I grasped in the thirty minutes of the film that I actually watched, Elvira is the arm-candy pretty girl of this incredibly intense drug circle that is run by Al Pacino and some other fabulous suit wearing hotties. Her style is the look I’m coveting for summer. She has these long slim arms and a long, fringed bob.  She wears long, long slinky dresses with exaggerated, plunging necklines. She also has this incredible clean-ness about her. In every scene she looks like she has just stepped out of a bath full rose petals and you can tell that she smells like vanilla cupcakes. She also wears the same set of jewellery through out the entire film. Bvulgari-esque diamond and sapphire drop earrings, a simple circle of diamonds around her wrist and one hell of a diamond perched on the ring finger of her right hand. 

Here is what you need to get to achieve this look…

* Black eyeliner and smoky grey eyeshadow for that heavy-lidded I-just-snorted-lines-from-the-toilet-seat look.

* A millionaire drug dealer boyfriend so you don’t have to ruin your nails with work.

* Speaking of nails you need them long and tapered and very, very clean and very, very shiny.

* Marlboro lights. Elvira only smokes cigarettes that are completely white. 

* A delicious but sensible amount of genuine sparkle. And I mean genuine. If you can’t afford it sleep with someone who can and then steal their credit card.

* Dress in head to toe monochrome.

* Apart from your thousands of dollars worth of bling the best accessory for a designer dress is a bitch stare.

* Carry a tiny handbag with nothing but cigarettes and lipstick inside. And never pay for anything.

* Hire a chef and a personal trainer but never eat or work out. Both will be detrimental to that waifish look that we’re aiming for. 

* Never, ever tan. 

Now all I have to do is find a job where I can lounge around in evening gowns sipping martinis and looking sultry… Any suggestions?

Love Lady Smaggle

xxx