Smaggle

I had to black and white today’s photo because this shirt, as beautiful and virginal as it was when I left the house this morning is now covered with copper filings and dust. Sigh… the one thing I miss about working in an office is the ability to keep clean all day. 

* Jeans from Jag

* Shirt from Cowboys and Angels (Canberra people… where do you shop now? I was so devastated when this store closed that I actually moved to Melbourne)

* Shoes from Big W

* Earrings from Diva

* Sunglasses from Itrip Iskip in Canberra

Oh and a quick question for you… A gal at school today said ‘Jesus Christ!’ when she hurt herself and someone playfully had a go at her for blaspheming. The blasphemer believes it’s not blasphemy if you don’t believe in God. Surely it’s blasphemy if you hear it and you believe in God though? Therefore making all God related curses blasphemy whether you hear it or say it. Thoughts?

Love Lady Smaggle

xxx

Lady loves…

* Fete season. Fairy floss, White Elephant stalls, chocolate wheels… there’s nothing like a Saturday in the sunshine eating snow cones and buying vintage Vogues. 

* This Greek lady at school who keeps bringing paper wrapped sweets to class. Buttery biscuits with jam inside and wafer cylinders filled with cream. I have a diet rule that if something is from another country and I’ve never tried it  before then it’s calorie neutral. Lucky she brings something different every week…

* Spring! Floral dresses during the day and cardigans at night. It truly is the superior season. 

* My bestie coming to Melbourne to drink gin with me this weekend. 

* The free ice cream van that came to my school today. Had me a bubblegum flavoured gelato that tasted a whole lot better than it looked. 

* Beauty and the Geek. I love Peter the fungal scientist and Lisa the aspiring actress. I’m seriously addicted. Although I heard a rumour that one of the geeks isn’t really a geek. How they discovered this or measured this is beyond me but I can’t wait until the truth is uncovered! 

Lady loathes…

* Long days spent inside when the sun is shining. 

* Selection criteria. 

* Watching Sex and the City in order and realising that Carrie is a total biatch. She is selfish, emotionally unstable and has ridiculous expectations of other people. I ADORED her when I was nineteen. 

* Spilling a whole lot of sesame seeds on my carpet and being too freaking lazy to vacuum them up. It’s really shitting me.

What about you angel bum? Anything to share?

Love Lady Smaggle

xxx

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Lady loves…

* Weight Watchers Cookies and Cream Ice Cream. The perfect diet treat. 

* Discovering that there is a FABULOUS traditional drive-in movie theatre just down the road from me. Co-Dependent Smaggle and I checked it out on Saturday night. We wore our ugg-boots, it was magnificent. 

* My house being clean and tidy. 

* My new enormous swishy neutral rain coat that I thrifted at a fete on the weekend. I also got some beautiful antique chairs. I bought furniture! Does this mean I’m a grown up now?

* Sex and the City. I just started watching it from the beginning again. I suspect that I shall do this every few years for the rest of my life. 

* Avocado. 

* Flicking through a massive stack of old Vogue magazines and tearing out the pretty pages to make collages. 

* Sunshine. 

Lady loathes…

* Seeing horrendous car accidents. No one was hurt but I’ve been shaky all afternoon. 

* Bad manners. 

* My course. For this week anyway… I don’t WANT to make a sleeved container, or a hinged box or an offering bowl. I want to make pretty earrings. Leave me alone. 

* Having a crap day yesterday and waking up with a purposefully positive attitude today only to find that today was even crapper than yesterday. Although my Frankie magazine arrived today. Thank god. 

* Business hours. I work and study in business hours. How am I supposed to call my landlord, pay my bills and go to the post office? Does this annoy anyone else?

What about you poppet face? Anything to share…?

Love Lady Smaggle

xxx

Spent this evening on Victoria Street in Richmond. Vietnamese CITY! Fantastic restaurants and bars…

* Dress from… a shop. On Chapel St. With a lovely sales lady. I hope that narrows it down for y’all…

* Cardigan from Cotton On in Canberra

* Tights from Big W in Canberra

* Shoes from Melissa

* Necklace from Mr Smaggle from NY

* Bangles from Equip

Best student quote from the day? After having an 18 year old Autistic girl with fabulous verbal skills stare at me for like 15 minutes I finally said ‘What?’ at her and she said ‘Why are you wearing a wig?’… I wasn’t wearing a wig. Golden. 

Hope everyone had a lovely Friday! And best weekend wishes to you too!

Love Lady Smaggle

xxx

I very, very rarely wear jeans. I just feel strange in them. Like I’m pretending to be someone that I’m not. So dresses and tights are my equivalent of jeans and a t-shirt… 

* Dress from Big W in Canberra

* Tights from Big W in Canberra

* Boots from Nine West

* Cardigan from Harem on Brunswick St 

* Scarf from Dotti

The weather is revolting right now so the photo is a little sleepy and misty… but I kinda like it. Off to the gym with Co-Dependent Smaggle and then watching Beauty and the Geek. We are very addicted. 

Love Lady Smaggle

xxx

I’m going to try to post more outfit shots of my ‘everyday’ wardrobe. This is what I wear when I don’t mind getting dirty. Like today… I know I LOOK clean but I am covered in apple juice, mud and about a thousand wet sneezes… yummy. 

* Dress from Cowboys and Angels (RIP – sob!) in Canberra

* Tights from Big W

* Boots from Redpath in Canberra

* Cardigan from Giodanno

* Obi belt – thrifted

* Leather jacket from Target in Canberra

* Scarf – present from my gorgeous girls Na and Sar – they gave it to me a month ago and I swear I wear it everyday. It’s black and it says awesome words like ‘theatre’, ‘opera’ and ‘carnival’ in massive white letters. Love. 

* Sunglasses from Itrip Iskip in Canberra. They are Le Specs. 

* Beret from Ebay. 

Love Lady Smaggle

xxx

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Many of you know that I am an aspiring  jeweller/actor/designer/writer/Queen of the Universe and the ‘aspiring’ part of that title requires me to have an actual job where I earn actual money. This job is teaching kids with special needs and I kind of freaking love it. 

I’m a relief teacher so I tend to do the rounds of my local area and I was at a school today that just happened to have an auditor there. He works for the government and it’s his job to observe teachers and to keep them in line so to speak. This guy was a total knob. Technically, he was observing another teacher but he clearly thought it was way more fun to annoy me than to actually do his job. I said ‘Good boy!’ to a kid who did something good and apparently you don’t say that. Because you are rewarding the student and not the behaviour. Or something. What? Since when is a term like ‘Good boy!’ detrimental to the development of a child? Special needs or otherwise? I also pretended to be confused like one of my students when he was distressed that he couldn’t complete a task and apparently that’s babying him. It just got worse and worse until I said ‘Well done mate!’ and copped the wrath of why you can’t say that to a child with special needs. Because I’m not his mate, I’m his teacher and by calling him ‘mate’ I’m confusing the boundaries between teacher and student. 

Dude. GET A GRIP! I’m an educated, intelligent, responsible adult who is well aware of my responsibilities as a teacher. I’ve attended the seminars, signed the forms and done the training. I’m not a kiddy fiddler. I’m also not a robot… and neither are my students. I will not be told that I cannot use terms of endearment with my students, I will not be told that I cannot give a student a congratulatory pat on the back or a sympathetic squeeze on the arm and I will not be told that these behaviours ‘confuse’ my students. I know how to draw the line if a student touches me inappropriately or for too long and I also know how to address these issues with my students without embarrassing them or making them feel awkward. I refuse to have a sterile, unfriendly environment in my classroom where my students feel that I am a stranger. I want them to know that my interest in them runs deeper than a paycheck. 

I also resent being told that ‘as a woman’ it is far more difficult for me to make these boundaries because my ‘maternal instinct kicks in’. Oh wow, I seriously just got really angry reading that back. If you want to pick on someone pick on the teacher that’s reading a magazine while his degenerative/vegetative student is sucking on a toxic marker. Also, FYI, my students will ‘not lose respect for me’ if I jump on the trampoline. Go annoy someone else, little man, I’m good at my job. 

What about you pie face? Any rants to share? Or an opinion on an a-hole manager? Or a discussion about how ridiculous the world has become when a teacher is told they can’t call a student ‘mate’?

Love Lady Smaggle

xxx

I have received so many emails from lovely readers asking me about my beauty routine. I’ve resisted doing a post on this because I think it’s really boring but it’s one of the things I love reading about the most on other blogs, being the perverted voyer that I am, and I assume the same goes for my whacky readers. So here goes… A visual diary of a day in the life Lady Smaggle’s bod…

8 am 

Brush teeth – Close Up is the BEST. 

8.01 am

Floss – Colgate non-fancy floss hurts the least. It’s nice and thin and doesn’t feel like you’re jamming knitting wool in between your teeth. 

8.02 am 

Mouth wash – Listerine is the bomb. Literally. I truly believe that Listerine stops me getting sick during winter. 

8.04 am

CG  Tinted moisturiser in Light – I have been using this everyday since I was sixteen. I’m all about sheer coverage. 

8.06 am 

CG  Mineral One Minute Make Up Powder – This is a recent addition to my routine and it stops that nasty nose shine that I’m prone to develop through out the day. 

8.08 am

Stila Eyeshadow duo in Bohemian – I actually received this as a freebie from Mecca Cosmetica and I LOVE it. Peachy pink tones on my eyes just seem to work for some reason. Go figure. 

8.09 am

Bloom Eye definer in Black – This eyeliner is amazing. I challenge any company to send me their eyeliner and make me love it more than this. I dare you. 

8.10 am

Cult mascara Maybeline Great Lash Mascara – I try other brands but I keep coming to back to Great Lash. I just can’t find anything better. 

8.11 am 

Cedel hairspray – Yes. I actually use this. It’s fabulous. 

12 midday

Aquim hand sanitiser gel – By midday my hands are either covered in snot if I’m teaching or acid if I’m making jewellery so Aquim is fast becoming a favourite product. I’m a heart beat away from carrying it in my handbag.

12.02 pm

Vaseline Intensive Care lotion – Daddy Smaggle is a plumber and for as long as I can remember there has been a pump bottle of this on our coffee table and I have to say that, considering his profession, Daddy Smaggle has some of the finest baby smooth hands that I have ever seen on a middle-aged man. I now have a pump bottle on my coffee table. 

10 pm 

Dove Body Moisteriser – This goes all over my body and then I wrap myself in my bathrobe while it absorbs. Delish!

10.05 pm

Nivea Fresh Deodourant - I LOVE this but it’s pretty expensive for deodorant so most of the time I buy Pink Mum in the spray bottle. 

10.06 pm

Olay night cream – Mamma Smaggle has been moisturising every night and day since she was thirteen and now she barely looks a day older than that. She’s not much of a make-up wearer but if there is one beauty habit I’m stealing from her it’s this. She’s also used Olay since forever so this product comes with Mamma Smaggle approval. 

1o.07 pm

Aesop Fabulous Facial Oil – This stuff is BEAUTIFUL. 

10.08 pm

Body Shop Elderflower Under-eye gel – I’m on the up-hill climb to 30 so I’ve GOT to start taking care of the skin under my eyes. This gel is so cooling and calming right before bed. 

10.09 pm

Lucas’ Paw Paw Ointment – Well der. 

10.10 pm

Sunsilk Anti-Frizz Leave in Conditioner – I like my anti-frizz products to be creamy. You may notice this is the Spanish version and if you look closely I believe it says ‘ant-poof’ on the bottle. He he. 

10.11 pm

VO5 Matt Clay – I love this hair product because being a gal of the curly haired variety most hair care companies think I want to look like I just stepped out of a pool of grease. Um… why? So thank god for the geniuses at Vo5 who realise that Pee Wee Herman ain’t sporting a look a want to copy. 

11.13 pm

Givenchy Organza – This is my scent. I like to smell like cookies.

What about you muffin bum? What are the fave products that you can’t live without? Please include links and share the love! Tell us everything… I love a good beauty routine goss…

Love Lady Smaggle

xxx

Postsecret

Lady loves…

* Co-Dependent Smaggle joining my gym. Nothing like a workout buddy to get you motivated.

* Starting Oct-sober. I’m going to be alcohol free for the rest of the month. I can feel my arteries thanking me already.

* Vera Wang.

* Sitting in cafes with Mr Smaggle working on creative projects.

* St Kilda.

* Being recongnised. Twice in one week!

* My driving-back-to-Melbourne Friday night date with Mr Smaggle. We listened to Harry Potter audio books, stopped for a decadent Japanese dinner in Albury and ate treats the whole way back. It was blissful!

* Unpacking as soon as I got home from my trip rather than leaving it on the floor for weeks.

* The weird kid sitting across from me who is wearing headphones and playing air guitar in the middle of the library. Sometimes I get really jealous of people and their lack of self awareness.

Lady loathes…

* The rude little bitch who shoved my chair forward at a cafe yesterday while trying to get to her table. I was sitting at a vintage table underwhich modern sized thighs do not fit. When I said ‘Hang on’ what I meant was ‘Don’t push my effing chair you little brat!’. Her mother was just as hideous.

* People who talk really loudly in shops.

* Slow teachers. I’m currently at school waiting for my teacher to get me a tiny piece of silver and I can’t actually do anything until he gets it. He is currently in the cafe having a coffee. ARGH!

* Being tired. I worked for the whole of my holidays and I’m totally exhausted.

What about you muffin pie? Anything fun to share?

Love Lady Smaggle

After the success of my first stocking necklace tutorial I have had several requests for more DIYs. After seeing the Degas exhibition in Canberra I was inspired by this painting to make a necklace that ties around the neck leaving a bow. 

Here is the finished piece…

First I cut the toes off a pair of old tights and cut down the sides to open them up. 

Then I drew a flower template on cardboard and traced the shape on my stocking material. I then cut out all the shapes. I made 5 sets of 5 flowers but you can do more or less if you like. 

Step 1 – Take a metre of ribbon and find the centre. fold each side upwards to form a square-ish shape. Glue with fabric glue and leave to dry.

Step 2  - Take 5 of your cut outs and lay them roughly on top of each other. Sew them together through the centre of each flower. You can be pretty messy with this step because it gives the flowers more volume. Arrange the flowers on your ribbon as shown.

Step 3  - Sew each flower to the ribbon and sew a crystal or bead in the centre of each flower. You may need to put a few extra stitches in and around the flowers to make them sit flat when you’re wearing your piece. All done! 

Happy crafting! 

I’m still new to the DIY thang’ so please leave feedback! 

Love you guys…

Love Lady Smaggle

xxx