ollowing on from last week’s post about over-apologising, it’s come to my attention that lots of people get roped into doing things they don’t want to do. I’m a real peace keeper and I generally go with the flow but if there’s something I really, really don’t want to do, I simply won’t do it. It’s never okay to be rude but it’s definitely okay to say no to things and not have to feel guilty about it. Here are 5 things you’re totally allowed to say no to…
Chipping in for expensive group gifts
If you get asked to chip in for a group gift for someone you don’t even really know that well, just politely decline and say you’ve already purchased a gift. Sometimes people get carried away with gift ideas and they have unrealistic expectations of other people’s enthusiasm. Just be firm and polite and buy your own gift if that’s what you prefer to do.
Shots
I’d like to preface this one by saying that I will NEVER say no to a shot, particularly if it’s tequila but I have many friends who aren’t into them and that’s totally fine. If shots make you gag or remind you of that night in 1999 when you slammed five Cock Sucking Cowboys and woke up wearing someone else’s pants, don’t do them. It’s not compulsory. Also if I’m around and someone is trying to peer pressure you into doing a shot, send them my way and I’ll give them a good talking too. #nomeansno
Activities you know you won’t like
Opera performances, renaissance fairs, backyard working bees or all night gamer-thons. If you’re not into the things that your friends are into, you don’t have to participate in their activities. My best mate loves golf and music festivals and I have zero interest in both of them. It’s fine because she doesn’t like the internet so I don’t make her come to blogging conferences. It’s totally fine to not do all the things your mates do.
Petsitting or babysitting
Personally you can’t keep me away from my mates pets or babies but it’s not everyone’s bag. Also some people feel down right uncomfortable and often very nervous about looking after alive-things that don’t belong to them, which is totally fair enough. If you don’t want to look after someone else’s small humans or fur-babies or if it scares the shit out of you, don’t do it. Just be polite and very vague about your plans so you can always say you’re busy.
Taking other people’s unwanted stuff
I spent years leaving my friends houses with my car stuffed full of old furniture and sets of out-dated plates – things they no longer wanted but couldn’t bring themselves to throw away. I’d end up keeping it in a corner of my house for a few months and then ditching it as soon as I could. Then I realised I was basically becoming a garbage collector for my friend’s stuff, so I stopped accepting it. Again, be firm and polite and say that you don’t have room for the item in your home.
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What things do you struggle to say no to? Any tips for getting out of tricky situations?
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19 Comments
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Say ‘no’ to crowd funding useless pursuits. Get out and earn your holiday/dishwasher/Hermes scarf you slack arse! (not you Carly… just those annoying people with first world problems)
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OMG this … this is just perfect. Everyone expects something for nothing these days.
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1000 times yes!
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Oh totally! I love kick-starters but they need to be for something decent.
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Helping other people move house or pick something up just because you have a ute! My husband finds it hard to say no but he works 6 days a week so doesn’t want to use his precious time off to move stuff for every workmate, acquaintance or friend of the family. Sure, immediate family and close friends is different but you should still be able to say no if you just can’t make it. We dont have a tray back ute now so that makes it better. We have a trailer instead we can just lend to peoole to do it themselves lol
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Yes! Lending people the ute is the best option! My dad’s a plumber so he spent most of his weekends fixing everyone’s plumbing. The worst.
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Yep my husband and his family are all tradies so totally get this!
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Agree with Steph above, having a trailer can be fraught with danger or at the very least, requests to help move. I’m getting better at the polite decline . . . wait, did someone say shots??? Hit me!
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Oh I know! I have a mate you owns a ute… poor bastard. He’s happy to lend it though which is great!
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haha love this. Ill add to the list favours for people who would never give you the same consideration!
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Oh totally – I’ve helped so many people move in my life who always seem to be busy when I’m moving!
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This post just made me feel sad that I can’t think of the last time someone asked me to do a Tequila Slammer, mind their kitten or attend a Renaissance Fair…
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Oh love! I don’t have a kitten nor do I go to renaissance fairs but I’ll meet you at the bar hey?
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I grudgingly admire my boyfriend’s ability to say no easily and not get sucked into feeling obligated to do/attend things. I’m working on it…
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Oh yeah it’s a hard thing to learn to do but just grow yourself some ovaries and go for it.
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You’re a crack up!
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Awesome list. Generally I am crap at saying no but slowly getting better at it. I always say yes to babysitting friends kids. Really struggle to say no to that one. Also when you get invited to your partners work colleagues bbq’s. Just cant think of anything worse than an arvo barbie with people I don’t know so i’m good at saying no to those ones!! Xx
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I don’t think I’ve ever said yes to one of those ever. I avoid work related (when I worked in an office!) stuff like the plague.
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