Why don’t you?

* Have a glass of red wine every Sunday afternoon? As a tribute to a beautiful week?

* Wear a designer scarf every day? Wrapped around your head? Tied to your bag? As a belt? Make it your signature piece?

* Consider the beautiful combination of pear and blue cheese at your next dinner party?

* Wear lip stain? With a tousled ponytail? Look like you’ve spent the afternoon rolling around in fields eating fresh raspberries?

* Make pancakes? Open the windows? Play French music? Drink coffee on a sun-drenched morning?

* Wrap all your gifts in white? Crepe paper? Cotton? Bleached calico? Tie them up with creamy raw silk ribbons?

* Use terms of affection? Beautiful? Handsome? Gorgeous? Delicious?

* Read a novel? A good old-fashioned fiction? From a second hand bookstore? With that distinctive second hand bookstore smell?

Love Lady

Xxx

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* Cough up a lung when they cook curry?

* Think it’s really weird/embarrassing when someone makes you repeat the joke you just made for the other people who didn’t hear it? Most of the time, you just had to be there.

* Get turned off apples for months if they happen to get a really shit one?

* Think that adults who sing in amateur choirs are just a teeny bit strange?

* Secretly hate Top Gear but pretend to like it in front of their boyfriend?

* Nod in sympathy as your friend tells you about their recent and violent bout of gastro whilst mentally restraining yourself from licking their face in the hope of catching it and dropping a couple of kilos?

* Get exceptionally itchy hair whenever anyone talks about nits?

* Pretend that people in other cars are stalking you on the way to work?

* Think I’m going to get my arse kicked for the adults in amateur choirs comment?

Love Lady Smaggle

xxx

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Something really unusual happened to me tonight. I saw a play at the Canberra Theatre, which I’ve probably done upwards of fifty times in my life but never before have I been left so speechless than I was after The Walworth Farce. I was with several close friends, all of whom are veteran actors, directors and theatre goers. At the conclusion of this play we had NOTHING to say to each other. Not one word. The play was utterly, utterly amazing. I can’t even find an appropriate positive affirmation. ‘Amazing’ is so asinine when describing this piece.

Tadhg Murphy was breathtaking. I have never seen such a controlled yet emotional performance. He hit the mark in every scene. I heard every word he said. I hung on every word he said. Playwright Enda Walsh should be on everyone’s radar. Brilliantly directed by Mikel Murfi, brilliantly acted by an exceptional cast. Just… brilliant.

The details of the show are here. I do need to preface this review with a little fact – I find fault in everything. Especially theatre. This is an exceptional piece of work. And when people ask you if you’ve seen The Walworth Farce you can both gasp, cover your hearts and wave away the conversation… because really… there are no words.

Oh and they are on their way to Sydney... book your tickets now. You won’t regret it.

Love Lady Smaggle

xxx

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Lady loves…

* Losing things you love and then finding them again. Like this red school uniform hoody from Oxford in England that I’ve had for years that I thought I lost. It reminds me of drinking snake bites at the boys college across the road and spending my taxi money on chips and mayo.

* Giving myself a good old wrist slapping. I skipped half my workout today because my pants were too loose, my socks were falling down into my shoes and one of my earphones wasn’t working. I chucked a mondo tanty. Then mentally kicked my own butt all the way home for being such a poor little middle class white girl. Seriously. Lets get some perspective.

* Soy milk smoothies with bananas and frozen blueberries.

* My beautiful friends organising an Easter egg hunt. It was so much fun. We were hurling abuse and last naming each other. I don’t believe I’ve ever used the phrase ‘You’re f*cked Milthorpe!’ during an activity specifically designed for children.

* Breaking Bad. We are utterly, utterly addicted.

* Swedish Hasbeens. They are crazy expensive but when I’m rich they are going to my signature shoe and I will have twenty different pairs and that’s all I will wear. With smoky eyeliner, slim leg jeans and inky nail polish.

* My Can I Get a Consensus? segments. I love you guys so much.

* Perfect apples.

Lady loathes…

* My inability to say no. I love being busy but sometimes I hate myself for not giving myself holidays.

* Waking up feeling pummelled. For no reason.

* Designing awesome jewels while drifting off to sleep and forgetting all about them in the morning.

* Living in two cities. It’s really starting to shit me.

What about you angel face? Anything to share?

Love Lady Smaggle

xxx

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Typical. The second I leave Canberra I get offered tickets to a burlesque show. As sad as I was to say no to such a fabulous evening the publicist contacted me and offered the tickets as a giveaway to my readers. So yay… I’m thrilled for you. Bastards. Here is all the info…

The Burlesque Hour… She’s Back!

Canberra, get out your fishnets and go glam!  Provocative, alluring, unmissable… The Burlesque Hour… She’s Back kicks off the Street Theatre’s 2010 season with a revved up mix of gobsmacking new acts, hot new stars, and spectacular requests.  Genre-busting, intriguing, provocative, totally unique - and beloved by audiences around the world, Finucane & Smith’s The Burlesque Hour has defined burlesque for the 21^stcentury.

FINUCANE & SMITH’S

THE BURLESQUE HOUR… SHE’S BACK!

VENUE The Street Theatre, Childers St Canberra City West

DATES OPENING NIGHT Thursday 11 February 8pm

SEASON Thursday 11 through Saturday 20 February

SHOWS Thurs 11 – Sat 13 & Tues 16 – Thurs 18 @ 8pm

Fri 19 & Sat 20 Feb @ 7pm & 9.30pm

VALENTINE’S DAY SPECIAL Sunday February 14 @ 6pm

TICKETS Standard: $37 Concession $33 Group +6 $30

Catwalk Tix: Only $10 more!

Valentine’s:  $43 Twilight Show w/ Cocktails all night!

BOOKINGS 6247 1223 or www.thestreet.org.au

The Street Theatre is delighted to offer 2 lucky Smaggle readers one double pass each to opening night, February 11, of The Burlesque Hour… She’s Back! To win, tell Smaggle a secret… what’s the most provocative thing you’ve done?

Anyone can comment but you must be in Canberra and available on Thursday 11th February to go into the draw. Please spread it around…. how often is there a Canberra exclusive competition? Entries close at 5pm on Monday 8th February. Oh and do let us know if you’re a Canberra dweller when you comment otherwise we won’t know!

So tell us… what IS the most provocative thing you’ve done???

Love Lady Smaggle

xxx

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Etsy

Why don’t you…

* Take photos everyday? Of you and your housemate eating cereal in your pajamas? Of your boyfriend cooking you dinner? Of you and girlfriends drinking tea and watching Sex and The City? Have photographic evidence of your everyday pleasure?

* Burn fragrant oil in your house? Rose? Strawberry? Frangipani? Let your house smell like a florist?

* Start everyday with a list? Write things like ‘Drink two cups of chamomile tea’? And ‘Rub yummy lotion into your hands after lunch’? Or ‘Text one of your friends to say that you love them’?

* Buy yourself expensive mineral water like lemon Perrier and take it to parties instead of wine? Be sober in style?

* Plant your own herbs? Have a delicious collection of mis-matched jars with bunches of green leaves growing in them? Basil? Mint? Lemongrass?

* Wear a brooch?

* Get up early and do a yoga class? Pretend to be a zen and centered person until the behavior becomes a habit?

* Play music in the kitchen in the morning? Rock out while you make your toast? Sing a love ballad as you cut up your salad for lunch?

* Go to bed early? Turn off the television and your laptop and read a book? Flick through fashion magazines? Leaf through those beautiful photography books you have collecting dust on a shelf?

Love Lady Smaggle

xxx

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Image

Why don’t you…

* Make little pom-pom shoe clips to jazz up your favourite heels? Clip them to the toes? The heels? The ankle straps? Just wear one? Or both but in different places?

* Drink green tea all day? From a dainty cup and saucer?

* Ditch all packaging in your kitchen? Replace unsighlty boxes and bags with mis-matched glass jars? For cereal? Rice? Lentils? Re-use condiment jars and bottles and have a pantry fit for a potion maker?

* Lie on the floor all afternoon and read an entire book?

* Get a make-over? Have a gorgeous beautician give you a brand new look? Try something new? Start wearing blush? Consider smoky eyeshadow? Bronzer? Berry hued lipstick?

* Stop thinking of cooking as a burden? Start making healthy and delicious dinners? Lentil curries? Herbed lamb skewers? Spicy vegetable noodles? Pop on an apron and pretend you’re Nigella Lawson?

* Eat only organic dark chocolate?

* Move your body? Take an adult ballet class? Pilates? Ballroom dancing? Be elegant?

Love Lady Smaggle

xxx

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Etsy

Lady loves…

* Spontaneously getting wasted with Mamma Smaggle on a work night.

* My cousin, who has the EXACT same taste in literature as me, handing me a stack of perfect books to read. FYI our taste goes along the lines of pulpy, trashy real life reads with a very heavy slant towards serial killers.

* Mr Smaggle fixing my bike. I can’t wait to go for a ride around the lake this afternoon.

* Vegie crisps when I’m really hungover. And coffee. And Panadine.

* This Pingu toy that Mr Smaggle’s brother, Mr Squiggle, gave to me for Christmas. When you squeeze it, it makes psycho Pingu noises. I must press it around ten times a day.

* Browny. She is such a loser. One of my readers tweeted about her today and she got so excited that she took a screen shot of the tweet and emailed it to herself. I keep catching her looking at it and muttering ‘People love Browny…’.

* My beautiful hand carved bangle that Co-Dependent Smaggle bought for me in India. I’ve worn it nearly everyday since she gave it me. I love it when you get given jewellery and it becomes an immediate staple.

Lady loathes…

* Being hideously hungover. It was totally worth it though.

* Not being able to eat healthily because I have too many social engagements. I know. Your heart bleeds for me right? I’m actually being serious. I can’t escape wine, cheese, bread and dessert at the moment. It’s killing me. I just need to eat nothing but salad and steamed greens for a week. Blergh!

* How slowly my mossie bites are healing. I’m a big itchy, weepy mess.

* People who don’t listen. Me – ‘Hello, Lady Smaggle speaking’. Person on the phone  – ‘Hi Judy…’. Yep. That’s fine. If you didn’t hear my name, don’t by any means ask me to repeat it. Just make one up. Preferably one that doesn’t sound anything like my actual name. That will make me think you’re awesome.

* My teeny tiny cousin suddenly being six feet tall. I mean it’s great for him, he is flipping gorgeous but I used to give him baths and read him stories. And now he drives a car. Excuse me. I have to buy some prunes and replace the batteries in my hearing aid.

What about you angel pie? Anything to share today?

Love Lady Smaggle

xxx

P.S One more loathe – Wordpress formatting being weird. I’m trying to fix it.

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Don’t you just HATE it when you have a house full of stuff that you just don’t need? And none of your friends want it? And you couldn’t be arsed taking it to Vinnies? And it’s just too good to throw away? This awesome new site (made by Mr Smaggle! Squeal!) Yoink lets you list all your unwanted stuff to be ‘yoinked’ by someone who really wants it! It’s a non-profit site that helps everyone re-use, recycle and embrace green living.

It’s too freaking easy for me to bother explaining how to use it so just visit the site and have a wander. There’s free range eggs, car parts, clothes, kids toys, jewellery… it’s awesome.

So you can give, get, not spend a cent and keep your unwanted items from becoming landfill. It’s like Ebay for free stuff!

The Yoink guys are also a running a competition where if you submit one of the first 10, 000 items you go into the running to win a $1000 Amazon gift card!

Oh and the iPhone application is on its way in January… so you can just wander around your house, take a photo on your iPhone and post it straight to Yoink. Couldn’t be easier.

Please spread the word!

Love Lady Smaggle

xxx

P.S. Oh and please do comment and let Mr Smaggle know what you think!

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Etsy

Lady loves…

* That I’m going home in one week for the summer. ‘Home’ being Canberra. I’m seriously jack of Melbourne this week. Then when Canberra starts pissing me off Melbourne will be home. I delight in being fickle. It’s one of my many charms.

* My juicer. It ANNIHILATES fruit and vegetables. Right now I’m drinking carrot, celery, apple and ginger juice. Hear that cheering? That’s my body celebrating. 

* Cleaning out my cupboards. Obviously not the act of doing it but waking up in the morning and diving into ironed racks of clean dresses and neat stacks of colour coded tops… sigh! 

* Planning a Saturday night celebration with my Melbourne family. That’s Roomy Smaggle (my house mate), Co-Dependent Smaggle (my wife) and Oadie (our collective faux boyfriend and the token salami of our family). Can’t. Freaking. Wait. 

* Getting back to the gym. I’ve been in the Berra for a week and although I’m fond of the Wii Fit there is nothing like a crazy pump class to get me feeling tops. 

* Regretsy. 

Lady loathes…

* Being asked this question – ‘Is there a reason in particular that you don’t want to be paid in cheques?’. Yes, because it’s not 1985. Heard of internet banking? It should be illegal to pay people in cheques. It’s like being paid in foreign currency. 

* That 90% of people that I came into contact with today told me they have diarrhoea. Excellent. I look forward to the next few days. 

* Trying to go dairy free. I have been having HORRENDOUS women’s monthlies recently and I read that going dairy free can really help with cramps so I thought I’d give it a go. The problem is that I’m so freaking stupid that I keep forgetting and eating really dumb arse things. I’ve got the soy latte down pat but then I go and eat a bowl of yogurt. Honestly. I haven’t gone one day with out dairy since I went dairy free a week ago. It’s not like I keep ‘giving in’ to dairy I just go blank when I eat cheese and then later I’m all ‘Oh… cheese is dairy. Shit. Did it again.’

* Wanting to go out for dinner and a glass of wine and not having anyone to go with! Everyone is sick or busy. Bloody Melbourne. Grumble, grumble. 

* People over-sharing on Facebook. In particular, medically. Shudder. We know I don’t censor things here at Smaggle and when I’m suffering an affliction (such as menstrual cramps) I will mention it, but I draw the line when it comes to medical details. 

What about you angels? Anything to share?

Love Lady Smaggle

xxx

P.S SO SORRY to my Squiz card winners! Your emails will be coming next week I promise. The Squizies are on it!

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