Be your best self.

It’s Okay To Be Wrong

It’s Okay To Be Wrong
Carly Jacobs
I

wrote an article on Smaggle many, many moons ago that I deleted quite recently. It was about how everyone thought I was a feminist and I wasn’t sure I agreed. I definitely supported the concept and ideals of feminism (obviously), I just didn’t really relate to the word ‘feminist’. Back then it was still a rather polarising word and we didn’t have Benedict Cumberbatch wandering around in hot t-shirts teaching us what feminism looked like. You know what? I was dead bloody wrong. I am a feminist, I always have been and I always will be. Back then I just didn’t really understand the word or what it truly represented. I was wrong and I take it back. I am a feminist.

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The reason why I am writing this is because I want to give you permission to be wrong, in case you thought you weren’t allowed to be. Admitting you’re wrong is really hard but it’s totally necessary if you want to function as a decent adult human. Writing about how I thought I wasn’t a feminist is pretty embarrassing but having people remember that article or refer back to it, assuming that’s the way I still feel is even more embarrassing. Being wrong is actually quite brilliant because it means you learned something you didn’t know before and you changed your beliefs to accommodate this new information. It’s just about the smartest thing a person can do.

I had a lady get quite grumpy with me at the supermarket a few weeks ago for taking a trolley through the self-serve checkout. When she complained to the store manager, he informed her that you are actually allowed to take trolleys through the self-serve check out. Once she was given this information, she continued to argue with him, telling him he was was wrong. People are terrified of looking stupid so when this woman was backed into a corner, she was going to fight her way out with incorrect assumptions, even if it killed her. Even after she was told by the store manager that she was wrong. Yes, she looked like a dickhead for making up rules but she looked like an even bigger dickhead by digging her heels in and refusing to admit she was wrong.

You’re allowed to be wrong and everyone will be wrong about something at some point in their life. Own it, admit it and learn from it.

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Have you ever been really wrong about something? Are you okay with admitting fault?

 

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14 Comments

  1. merilyn 9 years ago

    this is very good smags! … love it!
    people’s ego’s get in their way of saying, “I was wrong!”
    or “I’ve changed my mind” which happens as a constant in mid sentence too!
    I like to be mutable! … or could it be fickle! whatever!
    i’m often wrong and I don’t mind saying so!
    it’s about maturity and being adult enough to own up!
    I think in a rigid work place it would be difficult!
    thankful not to be there!
    btw I am a feminist!
    love m:)X

  2. KezUnprepared 9 years ago

    Fantastic. Oh, I wish more people knew this secret. I’ve never understood why people freak out about being wrong. Your example about the lady with the made up supermarket rules is just a classic. I would respect someone like that so much more if she had backed down, said “I am SO sorry. My bad. Now I know!” and moved on.
    You are totes a feminist and I love that about you 🙂

    • Author
      Carly Jacobs 8 years ago

      Exactly! I’m like ‘Dude. Calm down. It’s cool. We’re all mates here!’. xxx

  3. Erin 9 years ago

    Love this. I have managed to pass my perfectionistic tendencies down to my 8 year-old son and so he is quite hard on himself. I’m always reminding him that we make mistakes and then learn from them – they’re how we learn best. I may read him a bit of your article. 🙂

    • Author
      Carly Jacobs 8 years ago

      I have perfectionistic tendencies too and I have to work on it all the time! Definitely tell your son it’s cool to be wrong!

  4. chrisatpb 9 years ago

    Admitting you are wrong and learning to say “sorry” – probably 2 of the most difficult concepts for humans to come to terms with. Xx

    • Author
      Carly Jacobs 8 years ago

      Absolutely! Apologising is hard but so worth it. I always feel so much better when I apologise when I’m wrong.

  5. Mrs Woog 9 years ago

    I think only a very arrogant person will never admit that they are wrong. I am happy to admit that I get it wrong a lot of the time. Learn the lesson. Move on. Great post Smaggs xx

  6. I used to find this very hard but as I’ve got older and wiser I’m the first to admit when I’ve stuffed up!

  7. Sarah 9 years ago

    Great article! Firstly, for you being a feminist. Secondly, for the ability to admit you were wrong.

    I never, ever used to be able to admit I was wrong. Ever. I still struggle a bit. But I’m learning. Something that helped me learn how good it was, and how to actually go about being ok with being wrong, was watching The Newsroom. If you haven’t seen this show I highly recommend it! But back to the point, the characters in this show were really, really good and just admitting when they were wrong. Without shame, matter of factly, they would just say yep, I was wrong about that. That’s what I’m working towards 🙂

  8. MikaelaMikaela 8 years ago

    I’ve written the same thing in a comment on a website many moons ago and am also embarrassed by it. I am now proud to say I am fiercely feminist. *high fives*

    But dude, don’t take full trolleys through the self serve… just because you CAN doesn’t mean you SHOULD. Unless of course you can do a whole trolley in under 10 minutes. I feel this is a whole other blog topic in itself 😉 😉 xo

  9. Pepper 8 years ago

    I think I am wrong more often than right. Sometimes I need to be wrong to figure out how to get to being right. But sometimes, I am a slow learner! Once I realize I am wrong, I fess up. Might even apologize profusely. However, I have been duped into believing I was wrong, bent over backwards to make amends, only to be laughed at and humiliated. That makes it really hard to admit being wrong, before you are sure. What’s most difficult is when someone points out that everything about you is wrong. Feel my self-esteem crumble fast, making it more likely that I will be wrong.

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